Enjoy being a woman/nDraeger

The woman I interviewed is my sister, who grew up in Germany, and is now 28. My mom raised us very unconventional. My mother always told us to live our lives the way we want, as long as we are happy with our decisions. I think, my sister and I grew up very different than my grandmother did, who saw her role as a wife and mother. My sister always lived her life free from any commitments. She lives very independent and wants to implement her aims in life before starting a family.

What does 'being a woman' mean to you?

Sister: Hmm, this is a hard question to answer!
First of all I am happy about being a woman and I would say that I had an easy live so far (as a woman). I think it's the same to you because I am just 4 years older than you and I would say that we grew up in the same 'time'. You know, we grew up very different than our grandma and I think it's easier for women to live now than it was at a time our grandma grew up. You remember when she often told us about her view of a woman – for her, it means being a supportive wife. She did the housework which was harder to do than today, raised the children, and hold together the whole family – do you know what I mean? And there was no time for anything else like hobbies, sports or anything else we do now for our own pleasure. You know that I always wanted to travel and work in different places. I can do that, but I don’t believe that our grandma could have done this. Can you imagine? As a woman in this time, you were cast as a mother, and a person who takes care for the house and all this. But you couldn't really implement your dreams, I guess.

Yes, I know what you mean, but do you think our life now is easier than the life of our grandma?

Sister: So see, our grandma was absolutely dependent on our grandpa. He was the one who went to work and our grandmother was home, did the dishes and cleaned the house. And at this time cleaning the house, doing the dishes was not that easy like it is today. It was hard work for her. It was a full time job for her. But you see, today, I can do all that right after work. And I love to go to work – outside of home. I would die to stay home all the time and taking care for the house – I am so thankful that we have a dishwasher, a laundry machine, and everything is so easy to handle. Don't you think? I love to have all that time to meet friends, going out, making sports and all that. I think I can design my life more than our grandma could do.


I think the same and I can't imagine that our grandma had the same opportunities than we have now. So, the role of being a woman has changed a lot during the last generations. But can you think of an event where it was challenging for you to be a woman.

Sister:
Hmm, I don't know exactly because I haven't had many problems being a woman so far. But, can you remember the time I was working as a waitress in that restaurant? I don't know but my colleague, Susanne, and I we had always some annoying situations with male guests. Of course, we were supposed to treat the customers nice, doesn't matter if they were male or female. That's normal when you work in a restaurant. But some men treated Susanna and me very grotty. It was not obvious but they made little comments to make us feel just as a 'little, girly waitress'. Their gestures and little comments said everything. And I can remember that they tipped us always more than our mal colleagues. Ok, that was nice, but it made me feel always a little strange and degraded as person. These men were a minority and most of the time it was fun but these men made me feel awkward and not very comfortable being a woman. And besides this, our male colleagues had never had such problems. Guess why ….

But you know, I think that women in my age don't face the same hard challenges as their mothers or grandmothers.
And being a woman doesn't mean to me necessarily being a wife and a mother who supports her husband. Gender roles and expectations have changed and I kind of like that :)